At our family meeting my oldest son had asked me if it was ok for him to serve me the
divorce papers.
He did not want a stranger bringing these papers to me.
I agreed that this would be ok with me.
What a horrible conversation to have with your child.
My poor boy.
I sat at home waiting for my son to bring me the papers.
Just the thought of my husband handing these papers to his son to “serve” his Mom
filled my heart with agony.
With each new day my feelings about my husband darkened.
Everything changed about the way I viewed this man as the head of our family, as a
husband and as a Father.
As a man.
I felt numb as I waited for the papers.
Time ticked by and I sat quietly in my home.
The worst part was that my husband was still living in our home with me while I
waited.
It was a surreal feeling.
Nothing can prepare you for the day you receive that envelope.
That big manilla envelope.
My son handed it to me with emotions that crushed me.
I will never forget this day and this moment that my son had to play a part of.
I opened the envelope and words all jumbled together as I scanned the forms.
Superior Court, Dissolution, Divorce, Petitioner, Respondent, Date of separation.
I felt like I was having an out of body experience.
This couldn’t be me living this moment.
The day I had met with my boys for the family meeting, we made the decision that an
Attorney might be a good idea.
The process seemed overwhelming.
What were the proper papers to fill out?
What were the filing dates that needed to be met?
My husband had already secured an Attorney for himself, and was getting it free
through his job.
I had no idea how to walk through the divorce process paperwork on my own.
Overwhelmed was not a strong enough word for how I was feeling.
I spent the next few weeks researching Divorce Attorneys in my area.
That’s something you never think you will be doing.
I had never had to hire an Attorney in my life.
I sent out inquiries to multiple Attorneys explaining my situation.
I prayed and prayed and prayed some more for God to help me choose the right one.
I decided on an Attorney that focused on family law and was located fairly local.
The cost was hard for me to think about.
Spending money on an Attorney made me feel selfish.
It was hard, but I knew that I had to learn to overlook the cost in the hopes that somebody would
help to make sure I did everything right and hopefully was treated fair in the process.
And fair was something I was discovering was not on my husband’s mind.
I was already so far behind in the process.
I was lost and felt like I was being swallowed up.
As each day passed, and I saw the signs that my husband had been planning and
preparing for the divorce for a good year or two or more, I realized he had done his best
to make sure the divorce would impact him as little as possible-personally and
financially…